Star Wars is numerous issues, however it’s not often horny. Just a few issues spring to thoughts: Anakin Skywalker’s naked chest after a nightmare, Padme’s midriff within the preventing pit, or a sidelong look from Han Solo, however in latest historical past the franchise has been considerably devoid of intercourse and demise. Kylo Ren and Rey Skywalker had some chemistry, certain, but it surely was akin to 2 youngsters first discovering horniness: clumsy, awkward, and at instances, downright bizarre. And too many fashionable characters have been protected by plot armor, be it Boba Fett in his shitty Disney Plus sequence or facet characters in The Mandalorian.
The most recent episode of The Acolyte, titled The Grasp, is tailored for Star Wars’ grownup audiences, giving us an attractive villain and a physique rely often reserved for Home of the Dragon—and it simply so occurred to be one of many strongest episodes of the franchise but.
The very first thing I discover concerning the unusual, helmeted baddie that reveals as much as combat the Jedi on this episode are his arms. They’re naked, one thing we virtually by no means see for Star Wars dangerous guys, and they’re rippling with sweat-glistened muscle tissues. As he takes on the small military of Jedi attempting to guard Wookiee grasp Kelnocca, his biceps and triceps and forearms are on full show, shifting with unimaginable, harmful velocity, like a cobra repeatedly coiling and putting.
The lightsaber battle he takes half in is among the coolest I’ve ever seen in Star Wars. It’s masterfully choreographed, with Dafne Eager’s Jecki and Lee-Jung Jae’s Sol displaying off some spectacular expertise as they face off in opposition to somebody who doesn’t comply with the standard guidelines of engagement. We watch as they wrestle to adapt to the stranger’s techniques, which embrace him utilizing his helm to dam and quickly disable lightsabers. We see their faces change as they notice that is one thing the Jedi have by no means encountered, couldn’t even fathom.
The Acolyte showrunners mentioned they needed to offer us a lightsaber battle that might rival The Phantom Menace’s Duel of the Fates, and boy, did they. Jecki is mild on her ft and quick, leapfrogging off of objects to execute a stronger strike, whereas Sol’s anger on the lack of so lots of his variety slowly overtakes him, manifesting in the way in which he fights. By the point the opening half of the episode is over, there are cauterized holes gently emitting steam in virtually the entire Jedi, together with Eager’s Jecki, who dies fairly terribly after knocking the helmet off the thriller man.
We watch him punch three holes by her along with his newly break up twin sabers, and as her physique falls to the bottom we get our huge reveal: It’s Manny Jacinto’s Qimir, his hair dripping with sweat and falling in pointed slices throughout his face, arms on full show, eyes stuffed with rage. Evil has by no means seemed this good.
And in case you weren’t certain that Qimir, who has been secretly pretending to be a bumbling fool and never the grasp controlling Mae (one among two roles for Amandla Stenberg), is evil, he quickly after kills Yord (Charlie Barnett) in fairly probably essentially the most grotesque method ever seen in Star Wars. With Yord kneeling down in entrance of him, Qimir brutally snaps his neck. Yeah, he dangerous dangerous.
I watched practically the whole episode with my mouth hanging open in shock—shock that The Acolyte would kill off two characters we had been simply attending to know, shock at how good the fights had been, shock on the holes by our bodies, the snapped neck, and the unparalleled, unapologetic sexiness of Jacinto. The Darkish Facet ought to tempt you, and there’s no simpler manner to do this than by being scorching as shit.
That the episode ends with what seems to be a couple of notes of Kylo Ren’s theme as Qimir tenderly covers Osha’s unconscious physique with a scarf tells me two issues: The Acolyte showrunners know that we yearn for horny, murderous dangerous boys, and this sequence might tie into the films extra so than we anticipated. Is Qimir the primary ever Knight of Ren, the acolytes of the Darkish Facet who rose to energy when the Sith had been thought-about extinct, whose identify Kylo took as his personal? It certain looks as if it.
The subsequent episode of The Acolyte airs on Tuesday July 2 on Disney Plus. I hope your air con is working, as a result of I’m certain it’s gonna be one other scorching one.
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